What have we been doing?

Having playdates at the park with Sara and Zef.

Celebrating Jada's first birthday.

Going to PetCo and calling it the free Zoo.

Celebrating my 25th birthday at Momo (my Mom) and Gramp's house.
She made me the best birthday dinner EVER!
I told her exactly what I wanted to eat (even down to the cookie cake
that I wanted from the mall.)
I told her it can say "Happy Birthday Whatever, I don't care"
I just want cookie cake and well it said "Happy Birthday Whatever".
Thanks Mom, everything was GREAT!

Hanging out with Natalie and Marisa and
playing with the best bubble machine.

Playing with our "Coco" (that is what Kenya calls herself when she turns into a dog.)

Loving on baby Eli , Jay and Shannon's baby.

That's what we have been doing

1st doctors appointment/ the scare of my life/ update on Jason

I had my first doctors appointment today. I was so excited about going but so nervous. If you would have been reading my tweets I'm sure you would have laughed at all the different emotions I was going through.

I got there thirty minutes early and they were running about half and hour behind so I was waiting for about an hour and my mind was racing. It was going from everything was fine and I was convinced we were having twins to I knew for sure we had miscarried.

They finally called me back and had to check my weight (I'm starting out 13 pounds heaver than I did with both of my other pregnancy's), blood pressure (was great), temperature (which was a little high but not too high), then some other things they had to check.

They told me they would come get me once a sonogram room opened up. So more waiting and more mind racing.

Finally a room was open, it was an hour after my appointment time and and hour and a half since I had gotten there. Which is typical when you see a specialist it was just hard since it was my first appointment.

This is my reflection on the giant screen on the wall.
I was waiting for them to come in and do the sonogram.

I can't remember her name but a lady started the sonogram and all you could see was an empty sack. My heart sank and all I could think about was, "I knew it, I lost the baby". She looked around for a few minutes then turned it off and said, "We need to do an internal sonogram because I can't find the baby." I said, "Tell me the truth, do you think there is a baby in there?" I knew she couldn't answer that question but I was dying to know. She just told me that it was just really hard to see in there and that's why they needed to do the internal sonogram. She was very sweet and loving I'm so thankful she was in there with me.

I went to the restroom and texted Jason to let him know what was going on. It was everything I could do not to cry. I couldn't believe I was going to have to go lay back down and go through that all over again.

My doctor and the sonogram lady came in this time. He was trying to keep things light hearted asking me a few questions before he started the sonogram. I just wanted it to be over. He started the sonogram and all you could see again was the sack and no baby. He wasn't saying anything just zooming in and looking around. I was so sad, but I kept my cool, tears were welling up in my eyes but I held them back. He kept looking and finally we saw a tiny heartbeat. The baby is only about 7 weeks and was flipped the wrong way so all we could see was the heartbeat, but praise Jesus for that tiny beating heart.

My estimated due date is January 20th 2010.

My doctor said everything is fine and I will have another sonogram in 4 weeks so we can really see the baby and get a better date for my pregnancy.

My doctor asked if I had any questions and I said "I had a lot of questions but I forgot them all, that was AWFUL!" (referring to not being able to find the baby at first) he was really sweet and pulled the picture of the baby back up, he tried again to get measurements but the baby is just too small. He did tell me that the baby's heart is beating 122 beats per minute.

They were extremely busy and he could have just rushed out of there but he didn't, he spent a lot of time answering my questions and just made me feel a lot better. He said, "This is going to be a normal pregnancy and a normal baby." Of course, God is the only one who knows that, but it was so great hearing my doctor say it!

When he delivered the twins he had to cut vertically on my uterus so I can not try for a v-bac (which is fine with me). Also with the fact that he cut vertically on my uterus it is of up most importance that I do not go into labor because the risk of my uterus rupturing is very high if I go into labor. He normally does repeat c sections (if the cut was horizontally) at 39 weeks but since mine cut is vertical he wants to deliver before I go into labor.

He will do an Amniocentesis (a sample of the amniotic fluid, which surrounds a baby in the womb, is collected through a pregnant woman's abdomen using a needle and syringe.) at 37 weeks to make sure the lungs are mature. Then we should have a baby by the end of the year!

I'm so thankful for my doctor, I trust him and he is an expert at what he does. I'm praising God for the life He is growing in my womb!

Jason is doing much better today, too. Thank y'all for praying for him. I started feeling a little sick a few hours ago, please pray I don't get Swine Flu hopefully it's just a cold.

Austin/ Swine Flu/ Sonogram

We drove to Austin on Friday night after church, Jason and I were so tired on the way there we could not have been more excited to have made it to his brothers town house at 1am. Uncle Toe Toe lives in the coolest place, it's about 10 minutes away from downtown Austin but is tucked away in the woods. I have never seen anything like it before. Driving in Friday night we saw about 20 deer just hanging out on someones lawn. It was the coolest thing ever.

I didn't take very many pictures but here is one of Kenya with her Papa P (that's what she calls him), and Wita.

This is what happens when you go shopping with you grandparents at Target.

This is how Jason and his brother rolled all weekend in the Smart Car.

I though this was a cool picture of Uncle Toe Toe's reflection in his rear view mirror.

We had a blast in Austin we woke up Saturday morning ate breakfast at Central Market. Their breakfast is amazing if you have never eaten there please go you have got to try it! Then we went to a few vintage guitar shops, went to see Up in 3D (it's a good but sad movie, I don't recommend it for pregnant women), after that we went to Jason's Uncle Paul and Aunt Stephanie's house, they have three kids Anisa, Noah, and Megan. We all went to their community pool had fun swimming with all the kids and grandparents. Went back to Paul and Steph's ate some Rusty's BBQ which was amazing. Then we just chilled.

It was at this time that Jason decided to take a nap. I woke him up to eat and he was complaining about how tired and cold he was. My husband is the most easy going person ever, he never complains (unlike myself I complain a lot). I told him I thought we was just really tired so he ate and hung out with the family some more then fell asleep again.

By the time we got back to Jason's brothers house he was not doing well at all. He was tired, had chills, was achy all over. I still thought he was fine just overly tired so we went to bed. We woke up at about 8 in the morning and Jason was doing AWFUL he could barley walk all the color had been drained from his face and he felt more sick. We were planning on driving home from Austin that morning because I was teaching the kids at church and Jason was helping with worship. But after his Dad and I talked we decided I should take him to Urgent Care,... so I did.

Turns out Jason has Swine Flu. We couldn't believe it. His doctor said there was no reason to freak out it was just like the flu, just really contagious. She told us we needed to go home but we all needed to wear masks in the van. We headed back to Uncle Toe Toe's house to get our stuff and I could not find my glasses anywhere we looked for a long time but I had to leave them behind. I could see driving I just couldn't read street signs. Jason slept the whole way home and I was so sick to my stomach by the time we got home that I threw up.

So fast forward to today Jason has been in our room since Sunday only coming out to use the restroom. I take him food wearing my mask and Kenya gets to see him for a few minutes wearing her mask. It should last about 7 days his doctor said he could go back to work on Monday.

So far Kenya and I are fine we have no symptoms. I did have to take Kenya to the doctor yesterday she has swimmers ear and and infection on the outside of her ear but she seems to be doing fine with it.

Here is Kenya visiting Jason.

She has had a really hard time with Jason being home but her not getting to see him so we let her go in for a few minutes each day. I wash her hand really good once we leave the room.

She was so cute she ran to her room and got some books to read to her Daddy.

Jason was feeling horrible yesterday but is doing much better today.

I go for my first sonogram today at 2 I'm so excited about going but sad Jason will have to stay home. I will be twittering while I'm there. If you don't have twitter you can read my updated on the side of the blog where is says Our Tweets mine is the VKDD one :) I can't wait to come home and upload pictures of the newest member of our family!

Oh and I found my old glasses so I can see the street signs again :)

Christian Suffering

I have been thinking a lot about the baby growing in my womb and anxiously awaiting our appointment next week. (We will be going to my doctor for a sonogram on the 17th) Most days I'm doing good but then there are a few days where fear starts to grip me. I start worrying and wondering if everything is okay with the baby, is there even a baby in there, what if I have a miscarriage. These things run through my head a lot. I have been trying to trust the Lord and of course I know that fear is not from Him. I have been praying a lot and I know that no matter what happens God is sovereign over all things,... including suffering.

I was so blessed by our pastor's message Sunday, it could not have come at a more perfect time. He talked about Christian suffering. Here were his 5 main points taken from Jason's notes:

"A Theology of Christian Suffering" (1 Peter 4: 12-19)

1) Suffering is not strange for the Christian, it's normal
1 Pet 4:12 | John 16:33 | Phil 1: 28-29 | 2 Tim 2:12 | 1 Pet 1:6 | Acts 14:22 | 2 Tim 3:12 | 1 Cor 4:9-13

2) Christian suffering is sanctifying (purifying)
James 1:2 | Rom 5:1-5 | 1 Pet 4:12 | 1 Pet 1:6-7

3) Christian suffering is useful for our assurance and our rejoicing in future glory
1 Pet 4:13 | Acts 5:41 | 1 Thes 1:6 | 2 Cor 12:9 | Rom 5:1-2

4) Christian suffering is a indication of God's favor and blessing
1 Pet 4:14-16 | 2 Cor 1:8-10 | Isa 11:2 | 2 Cor 12:9 | 1 Pet 2:20

5) Christian suffering is part of God's future judgment
1 Pet 4:17-18 | Mal 3:1-6

6) Christian suffering should cause us to lean on our sovereign God
1 Pet 4:19


I encourage everyone to listen to this message (which you can download HERE). It really put everything into perspective and I know that no matter what, no matter if our baby is fine or if we are about to walk a similar road that we did last year, God is sovereign over all of it!

I can rest knowing that no amount of fear or worry is going to change God's plan for our lives so I trust the Lord with my life and the lives of our children. I rest knowing that I serve a God who is not caught by surprise when suffering happens but is in control of it, allowing it all to happen for His glory and our good (Romans 8:28).

I praise God for the life growing in my womb and whether we get a few weeks or a life time to love on our little one I will praise God and enjoy our baby for the time He has given us with him or her :)

The Lord give and the Lord takes away,
blessed be the name of the LORD!
(Job 1:21)

Vanessa

Mother/ Daughter Breakfast

The Saturday before Mothers Day all the ladies went to a Mother/ Daughter Breakfast at the church that Jason's parents go to.

We had such a good time. We got there and hung out with everyone for a little while then we had breakfast. Afterwards we had a time of worship then heard a message about how we love God because He first loved us (1 John 4:19).

Kenya enjoyed some snuggle time with Wita (Jason's mom) during worship.

They had all the kids go back and make Mothers Day gifts,...it was so cute!

This is Jason's Aunt Lori and I. This was both of our first Mothers Day after losing babies so it was emotional, but I was so thankful to be there with her! I love you Lori!

Here is our crew. Jason Aunt Ana, Jason's Godmother Sylvia, Aunt Lori, Me, Kenya, Jason's Aunt Maca, Jason's Grandma Amada, Destinee and Rose (Jason's Mom aka Wita)

It was such a fun day I was so thankful that we were able to be there.