A little box

There is a little box in the top of our closet that the hospital gave us after the twins died. I see it all the time but tonight I decided to open it and take some time to remember my girls. As I opened the box I was flooded with so many emotions. It was like I was transported right back to November 11th 2008 the day I met and lost my babies.

As I dug through all of my girls belongings I had forgotten so many things that were in there. I pulled out their booger sucker, their hospital bracelets, the sweetest most encouraging cards ever, I pulled out the little post card that was on the door of our hospital so that everyone who came in would know we had lost a child, it wasn't until I got to their shirts that were still buttoned together that I lost it. I realized I often go through life not thinking about the fact that we really had conjoined twins, they really died and I really have 2 babies in heaven. Kenya is really a big sister to three little siblings not just one, Judah really is a little brother to three big sisters not just one, I really buried two of my kids and walked away leaving their tiny little bodies in the ground still stuck together, I really have four children not two, I am a Mom to 2 perfectly healthy children and 2 children made whole in Heaven.

God really allowed us to walk through that trial with His help and for His glory alone. Jason really experienced all of those things right alongside of me and made sure that I was okay before ever thinking of himself. We really, really, really were and still are the parents to conjoined twin girls made whole in heaven and for all of that I am thankful! A little box in the top of my closet reminds me (as my friend Kristy said) that God is sovereign over suffering and He is still good!