Friday, October 17, 2008

Pediatric Cardiologist (one of the harder days)

Well we went to the Pediatric Cardiologist today
to have an ECHO (a really long sonogram for their heart) done.

The doctor that did it was so nice, she had a great bed side manner and was just so sweet. We got a ton of information about their heart, however, none of it was good.

As you know, they are sharing a heart with one ventricle, and now it looks like the baby on the right has a better connection to the heart. I don't know all the technical terms but basically this babies arteries have a better connection that goes from the heart to the lungs.

Regarding the baby on the left, her arteries may not even go from the heart to her lungs. In fact she may not even have lungs.

The next step is to have a CT/MRI done to see if the baby on the left has lungs. After they figure that out then there are three options,...none of which are good.

1) Do nothing after Melody and Madison are born (granted that they are born alive) and just spend time with them and see how long they will make it. The baby on the left has a heart defect that with in a few hours to days after birth will be fatal for both babies if they are left together.

2) (If they both have lungs and are born alive) Do open heart surgery to put shunts into their heart to help it pump better. Even if they do this they are not sure how long the girls will live because a heart with one ventricle will eventually give out. It's not strong enough for one baby let alone two.

3) If the baby on the left does not have lungs (and the other is still alive) then separate them after birth and give the baby on the right a chance to live. The life expectancy is still unknown because the baby will still only have a heart with one ventricle, and a donor heart will not work since each baby does not have the right connections (or artery hook up) since their heart and what is connected to it is currently malformed.

Please understand that we would NEVER in a million years separate our babies and allow one to die so that the other one could live. They only way that we will separate them is if the baby on the left does not have lungs, because neither one of them would make it at that point if we left them together.

Please be praying for Melody and Madison and that if it is the Lord's will that He would heal their heart.

Please be praying for wisdom for the doctors in the up coming weeks.

Please please be praying for Jason and I we have some very hard ethical choices to make in the next few weeks, choices which we hope to answer with wisdom, the council of others, and prayer. As the situation stands, it seems like they all result in death which breaks our heart. Jason and I are deeply grieved by all the news we heard today but we still say, "Blessed be the name of the Lord who gives and takes away!" (Job1:21)


After we heard the news and the doctor stepped out of the room I (Vanessa) just started singing the first part if this hymn

Praise to the Lord, the Almighty


1. Praise to the Lord,
The Almighty, the King of creation!
O my soul, praise Him,
For He is thy health and salvation!
All ye who hear,
Now to His temple draw near;
Praise Him in glad adoration.



Here are the rest of the words. (Verses 2 & 3 kept running though my [Jason] head)

2. Praise to the Lord,
Who over all things so wondrously reigneth,
Shelters thee under His wings,
Yea, so gently sustaineth!
Hast thou not seen
How all your longings have been
Granted in what He ordaineth?

3. Praise to the Lord,
Who doth prosper thy work and defend thee;
Surely His goodness
And mercy here daily attend thee.
Ponder anew
What the Almighty can do,
If with His love He befriend thee.

4. Praise to the Lord,
O let all that is in me adore Him!
All that hath life and breath,
Come now with praises before Him.
Let the Amen
Sound from His people again,
Gladly for aye we adore Him.


This was one of the harder days I (Jason) had, it was impossible for me to be strong for my wife at this time, I had a lump in my throat for hours and was trying so hard (with tear stained eyes) not to breakdown. But once Vanessa went to the bathroom and came out she found me even unable to speak cause I could do nothing but cry. One verse that kept going through my head was:

"Though he slay me, I will hope in him;..." Job 13:15

Though we know the theology of God's sovereignty and suffering (which I hope to blog about soon) and I am glad we do (otherwise we may wind of cursing God rather than hoping and trusting in Him), it is times like these when you just need to weep in your wife's arms and be still and know that God is God. I am so thankful for the body of believers who are standing with us and even weeping with us. I am thankful to God for saving me,...I can only imagine that I would be in utter despair at this time if I was not a Christian with a living hope. There is no other sufficient answer but Jesus Christ and his great name and renown.

Have you thanked God lately for giving you a heart that works properly? And for you Christians, have you thanked God lately for removing your heart of stone (the heart which is deceitful and wicked above all) and giving you a heart of flesh (a tender heart that loves Him and finds your highest joy in serving Him)? This alone is possible with God. Praise Him!

Thank you for all the love and support, we will continue to seek God's face and His will during this time.

We love you all,

Jason, Vanessa, Destinee, Kenya, Melody and Madison.

21 comments:

The Sappingtons said...

Jason and Vanessa,
We grieve with you and we pray with you during this difficult time.

"In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul." Psalm 94:19

Andrea & Jim-Britt said...

My very dear friends,
My heart is broken for you both, I am so sorry you are hurting. I will be in constant prayer for you for wisdom & peace. I love you both very much!!

All my heart!
Andrea

Unknown said...

my God...

i can hardly type through my tears...i both mourn and rejoice with you my friend...MnM are loved. Things are not as they should be but His grace is sufficiet. I Love you brother.

-Curt

Homegrown Tribe said...

I am so sorry... praying for peace beyond understanding and for complete healing of your precious little girls.

Brittany

Teri said...

weeping and praying with you. if only i could carry a minute portion of the burden...

Teri in MO

Javier said...

19 I remember my affliction and my wandering,
the bitterness and the gall.

20 I well remember them,
and my soul is downcast within me.

21 Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

22 Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

24 I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."

25 The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;

26 it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD. Lamentations 3


Praying for you guys.

Joel said...

Whate’er my God ordains is right:
His holy will abideth;
I will be still whate’er He doth;
And follow where He guideth;
He is my God; though dark my road,
He holds me that I shall not fall:
Wherefore to Him I leave it all.

Whate’er my God ordains is right:
He never will deceive me;
He leads me by the proper path:
I know He will not leave me.
I take, content, what He hath sent;
His hand can turn my griefs away,
And patiently I wait His day.

Whate’er my God ordains is right:
His loving thought attends me;
No poison can be in the cup
That my Physician sends me.
My God is true; each morn anew
I’ll trust His grace unending,
My life to Him commending.

Whate’er my God ordains is right:
He is my Friend and Father;
He suffers naught to do me harm,
Though many storms may gather,
Now I may know both joy and woe,
Some day I shall see clearly
That He hath loved me dearly.

Whate’er my God ordains is right:
Though now this cup, in drinking,
May bitter seem to my faint heart,
I take it, all unshrinking.
My God is true; each morn anew
Sweet comfort yet shall fill my heart,
And pain and sorrow shall depart.

Whate’er my God ordains is right:
Here shall my stand be taken;
Though sorrow, need, or death be mine,
Yet I am not forsaken.
My Father’s care is round me there;
He holds me that I shall not fall:
And so to Him I leave it all.

Anonymous said...

Hi Delgado Family,

I've been following your blog since I've heard of you from Trisha Ramos.

My heart breaks for you, but I am so encouraged by your eternal perspective and your trust in God's sovereignty. I'm sure you're making a great witness to the medical professionals, and I am confident you are glorifying our Lord Jesus.

You remain in my prayers!

with love in Christ,
Mark Sohmer
New Hampshire

Stephanie Rohloff said...

We love you so Delgado's and we are praying for you...your faith and love for our Lord brings such comfort to my heart...I hope that makes sense...you are bringing such Glory to His name with the Honor you are ascribing to Him. It is a blessing to see such faith and trust in Christ!
We love you!
Steph

Unknown said...

I just wanted to say I am praying for your girls and your family. I am sorry you both have to make such a diffucult choice...my prayers are with you. I have never commented before but wanted you to know I am praying for your girls and you and your family.

Anonymous said...

V & J, I am just at a loss for words. I can't describe how sorry I am you have not had better news. Hugs and prayers are coming your way. I too wish we could shoulder some of the burden. See you in just a few days. Love to all.

noahandlylasmommi said...

I am praying for you and your precious babies.

Anonymous said...

We are praying and beleiving that God is Almighty and that He will sustain you with His love, strength and peace. We love you Delgado family.
-Sotelo family

Psalm:145:17-19

Michelle said...

Please know that we continue to pray for you daily. We will pray for God's healing for those precious babes and for His peace to bring you comfort like no other can.

Misty*Dawn said...

Vanessa and Jason, My family and I only know you through your blog. It seems as though we are worlds apart (we live in Kentucky)yet at times we feel so very close. We have grown to love you and our hearts grieve and ache for you at this time. We are continually praying for you and your baby girls. Please remember that there are people out there that care and hurt for you and we are praying earnestly for you!
Scott & Misty Bryant and family

Anonymous said...

HI!

I wanted to comment because my husband was born with a similar heart condition...single ventricle with weird wiring. He would love to discuss his condition with you if you'd like. He is 44 now and has had MANY surgeries - now is facing transplant but he has a lot of information that may be helpful or at least comforting to you. Please contact me at matzahandmarinara at gmail dot com and I'll give you his email address or give him yours...whatever is most convenient. Don't give up hope!

Simcha

Chris and Sara McCulloch said...

We love you guys...and we love M&M...Ya know, this has been a difficult journey, and continues to be so challenging, but I just want to say that from this end your little girls have been a vessel of grace and conviction in our lives.

I sat today thinking of how much I am sad that this is happening, and then I realized how grateful I am for their lives. How much my heart is already moved with love for them, and How much they have been used by God to bring us to our knees.

J & V, we want you to know that though we grieve for the circumstance we rejoice in their life.

They are already being used mightily even from the womb...I am astonished that God is challenging our hearts, convicting us, bring us to our knees, and causing us to dig deep through their lives...They are a precious blessing, and a miracle from the Lord.


We are trusting with you that God's will be done and that whether 2 days or 80 years they will be vessels of God's Glory for generations to come...

We thank God for Melody and Madison!! Thank you for faithfully sharing their lives with us. We love you and can't wait to hug your necks (and Belly)! ;)

Love
Chris and Sara

The Burt Family said...

Jason and Vanessa,

I learned of your situation through Stephanie and Paul and have been following along over the last few months. Many thoughts and prayers are with all of you!!!

THe Burt Family
Pearland, Texas

Anonymous said...

Dear Jason and Vanessa, this is Shannon and Ben Block writing (Chris & Sara Mcculloch's sister). We have been following your blog (Chris and Sara have been sharing it with us) and are so moved from reading your last blog. We can't describe with words how we are feeling for you guys. We are praying for you and so are other people here in Washington. In some ways we can relate to pain with you; our twins were born at 28 weeks and weighed under 3 pounds and the odds of them making it were not good. They lived 2 months in intensive care. Our heart connects with you guys on a deep level and know that your lives are being used to glorify God now, even in the hardest of hard situations. Praise God that we have eternal hope & joy, and He will continue to be so near to you. We are on our faces for you guys. We understand what it feels like to grieve over your children. No matter what, His Spirit will walk with you through everything, closely walking beside you. All our love to you guys.

Karen said...

I am visiting your site for the first time. I linked to it because it said twins and I have 12 year old twins. I am now praying for your family.

Anonymous said...

Hey Vanessa! It's Linda, Karina's sis in law. Not sure if you remember me? We met one day at Karina's house and shared our kid's birthing stories, they were very alike and we laughed! :) I just want to tell you that I've been watching your blog and have been praying for you and your family. Sometimes I cry to see your strength and words of encouragement even when you are the one going through this. I just wanted to tell you that you are a blessing and that God's name is being glorified through all this. Stand firm on His word, which you show everyday that you are, and know that you have many people praying for you and your little angels. Take care and God bless!!

Linda Brill